Life in Lists: Things I have cleaned off my kitchen floor this week

I could do with their help Image Credit:
I could do with their help
Image Credit:

Since babygirl has gotten mobile it seems that I am cleaning the floor constantly to remove choking hazards or sticky messes that she can play in. We’re flying through kitchenroll and the anitbacterial spray is rarely out of my hands. I’m not used to mopping this often, despite owning what I considered at the time to be a life changing appliance, my steam mop just doesn’t get as much use as it should. Until now. A day doesn’t pass (in fact hardly an hour passes) but there is some major baby unfriendly spill that needs dealing with.

So, in an effort to take some good from all the wiping up I’ve compiled a list of some of the things that I have l cleaned off my kitchen floor in the last week or so.

I’m documenting it in the hope that I’ll look back in this wistfully in a few years when I have clean floors and miss all the mopping. Here’s hoping!


Things that I have cleaned off my kitchen floor this week:

  • a stood on frube – super stickiness, confirming that they are evil and they shall never enter the house again
  • a smashed jar of ploughman’s pickle – I didn’t even know we owned one but it flew out of the press, bounced off me and shattered into a gazillion deathly sharp splinters
  • one third of a bottle of sunflower oil – argggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, this was NOT me, this was a foraging three year old seeking biccies- he didn’t tell me til I slipped on it. It’s very very shiny
  • Playdoh, various colours
  • several glasses of juice, multiple flavours
  • broken GLASS bottle of malt vinegar – I’d love to blame a child for this but alas, it was me that broke it. Well, it has disinfectant properties doesn’t it? And it’s a nice change for the house to smell like a chipper rather than its normal smell
  • dried in Weetabix- aka cement
  • a smashed GLASS jar of pesto- ARRRRGHHHH stinky, greasy, oily mess, and glass travels so far, still finding bits
  • hot chocolate
  • a sticky marshmallow- leftover from hot chocolate, missed in the initial wipe up as it was hiding behind a chair leg
  • baby puke – pretty reasonably foreseesable
  • pee – ditto, sigh
  • Branflakes (many)
  • milk -no use crying over it, eh?


photo credit: theirhistory via photopin cc

15 thoughts on “Life in Lists: Things I have cleaned off my kitchen floor this week

  1. I’m not sure about the messy floor but you and your family are very clumsy! I think the sunflower oil is the worst here. It is one messy mess.

    1. Tric I am very very clumsy, my eldest is as bad as me, the middle fella is just a normal moving too fast three year old. My presses are badly stacked too which means that things are more likely to fall. But ARGH

  2. If I have to clean any more weetabix off my floors I am leaving home!! Lol – it really is cement and it is my 2 year old that loves it – the messiest of the crew!

    Just got our downstairs floors sanded and I am like a neurotic lunatic!

    Am sure I will be back to manky floors in good time – at least I have no crawlers….isn’t it all good for the immune system (bar the glass!!)

    Good luck!

    1. The knees of Laoise’s tights are disgustingly dirty and I’m hoovering a couple of times a day too, which is a HUGE increase! The bloody weetabix though…

  3. I cannot remember the last time we had something smash here. That is a lot of broken glass with a crawler on the loose.
    Weetabix should come with a do not let dry in warning.
    I also had a lot of play doh on the floor and rugs this week.

    When my daughter was crawling I had a few pairs of crawling track suit pants that I would put on over her clothes to save the tights, otherwise you would be only getting one wear out of them

    1. Until this week Pearl I couldn’t remember the last time we had a smash either, we’ve just had a bad run of it. Good tip on the tracksuits, I used to have dirty ones at home for the boys to do that… not that my floors are dirty of course (ahem) Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment

  4. Um, I thought my floors were bad, but you’ve made me feel great!! Thank you. We have spills but nowhere near the list above. I definitely, definitely don’t think you’re going to look back and missing the mopping ūüôā

  5. I can laugh because that’s behind me now….Not the messes (especially frubes) but the caring….Sterilisation isn’t on our radar anymore and, honestly, I don’t know when I mopped the floor last (baby wipes under foot doesn’t count, does it?!!!!). Sorry about your floor but thanks for the laugh!

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